Do People Sometimes Want Depression?

I know it can be very frustrating when someone youdepressed, I try to pay attention to what works and
care about is depressed and won't even do simplewhat doesn't and do more of what works. It's a simple
things to help themselves. I have a friend who hasphilosophy, but it works better than anything else.
been depressed most of his adult life, often knowsEveryone is a bit different, so no one thing works for
what he should do, and won't do it. He's pretty much aeveryone. You have to experiment and take notes.
shut in now. But does he want to be depressed? No.Sometimes people need to be heard. Sometimes
He's suffering. I don't think anyone wants to suffer.instead they need to be interrupted when they start
I think it's a case of sometimes we don't know howfeeling sorry for themselves and saying the same old
hard it is to do something unless we walk in theirthings that always make them feel depressed.
shoes. I catch myself sometimes doing behaviors that ISometimes taking charge helps, like going to their door
wish I didn't do, that I know aren't good for me, and yetand saying, "get dressed, we're going out today, don't
I'm sometimes mystified how to stop. I can understandeven think about not coming!" Other times they need
how this can be for anyone.to feel their inclinations respected. Which method will
Depression can become a safety zone. Often whenwork depends on their nature and where they are at
people are depressed, less change happens in theirthe time.
lives and they want less change. Change can be veryUltimately, their success is up to them. It may take a lot
scary, but change is also important. Sometimes though,of time to feel better, but they need support and love
you have to do baby steps to get change happeningand acceptance, and we can help. I just try to pay
again.attention and listen carefully to their feedback of what
Whether I am trying to help myself or a friend who isworks for them and what doesn't.